In which we plumb the depths of one Japanese star, chosen entirely at random.

This entry (a photo essay, really) has been guest-blogged by Regan.

You might wonder why it is necessary to have alternate perspectives represented on these pages. I might nod sagely at your inquiring expression before explaining (with a hint of my characteristic condescension) that this entry does not introduce an alternative perspective. Any opinions implied or expressed directly in this piece are, in fact, Eugene’s. The only way you’ll know that I am writing and not Eugene, is that there will be no (further) digressions about incontinence. Or crying. But he was away this weekend, and had I not written in his stead, this blog would have been hollow and empty, the lonely wind screaming through its narrow corridors.

Let’s begin. Kamenashi Kazuya (Kame-chan to his fans, born February 23, 1986, blood type B) has been blessed with the talent trifecta: singing, dancing, and acting. Björk, can you dance? George Michael, can you act? Didn’t think so.

[Source: Nobuta wo Produce]

[Source: Dream Boys 2006. Thank you, Eugene, for making a copy of your disc for me.]

Kame-chan can also play baseball, volleyball, sword fight, fly through the air, and speak Japanese. Justin Timberlake, can you do these things? How about you, Beyonce?

Young Kamenashi packs a lot of star power into his diminutive frame (172 cm), managing to contain both masculine AND feminine wiles. Check him/her out here singing the ballad “Kizuna”:

Kame-chan was sold into auditioned for and won a place in Johnny’s Juniors (a sort of training program for future male pop stars) in 1998. His singing group KAT-TUN was compiled in 2001 from six promising Juniors boys. Kamenashi takes his work for the Johnny’s Entertainment syndicate very seriously, even when encumbered with challenging costumes. I predict a great future for this young man.

Kame-chan is a true artist, striving to communicate about the human condition throughout his many ventures. Here I have excerpted a text message sent to his fans to demonstrate his commitment to personal expression:

This gifted star has received honors in disciplines all across the entertainment spectrum, including the hyper-competitive field of clothes-wearing:

He’s also the perfect pitchman, lending his face and charm to such disparate products as cellphones, gum, chocolate, Dance Dance Revolution, lip balm, eyedrops, and vitamin-enriched carbonated beverages:

In conclusion, Kamenashi Kazuya is the ultimate pop star because he is multi-talented AND completely shameless. Even styled with his hair looking like ramen, Kame-chan gamely executes a pole-dance to Madonna’s Like A Virgin on a morning news show:

Coming soon in essay form: Why YamaPi is a worthy adversary. Please look forward to it.

P.S.: Hey, Eugene, have some pudding!

This entry was posted by regan on Monday, December 11th, 2006 at 12:43 am and is filed under japanese, music, tv. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.